So I havn't wrote a "real" journal in a long while. Been kinda busy lately.
but I need to Fent so I am going to,

GAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am not been able to like take my life right now. God hasn't done anything good for me in like 3 years. But the only thing he did good id bring my Boyfriend Dennis into my life.

but i am blaming cancer for Everything now. My dad has Cancer all over his body. And he has only 3-6months to live. And now he is in a nurseing home on "Hospice" and I really don't like it. I don't want live the rest of my life not having my dad in my life. I love him. even though we hav had are Differnces. Alot of them.

And my grandma just died on July 14th. and now my dad. i known my grandma my whole life and she was the nicest grandma anyone could hav. I don't know why she deserved to did at the age of 79. It isnt fair at all. she has a long life ahead of her.

My mom is depressed and everything. I don't want her to go through all of this. And then I am cutting myslef again. And I didn't want her to find out but she did anyways I did on my chest hopeing she wouldn't find out but she did.

and I am being a mooody little cunt. And I don't like being like that. but I am mad at the world for what they hav been doing to my family. It fucking sucks. I am also blaming God for everything I really don't like him all that much.

But I am sorry if it sounds like i am complaining. but to go through this at the age of 14 is very hard for me. Sorry.


Alright I am about to go see my dad so I will talk to you all later buh bye.

-Colette,The bitch.